“People Just Like You” Series – Dolly Parton “You will never do a whole lot
“If it cost you peace of mind, the price is too high”
Have you learnt some too? Lets find out!
Life is a teacher
It is often said that life is indeed a teacher with no remorse for your mistakes. Because we can’t grow as a person without making a few mistakes every now and then, it is therefore important to learn from our experience in life and use that as a tool for personal growth.
First, we must learn to reflect on any situation we find ourselves at some stage in life. Whether desirable or not, there is always a takeaway that can be applied to future circumstances. Some of these lessons are pretty much very obvious, while many others will take a drastic change in us to see it. However, the lessons it teaches are invaluable and the earlier we learn about them the better for the journey ahead.
Let me drop a subtle hint!
Whenever you question a situation you find yourself in, there is probably a lesson or two to learn therein.
You will learn valuable lessons from people who’ve come in and out of your life no matter how brief just as you will learn both from failed relationships and those that have evolved over different parts of your life to be stronger now than they ever were.
A friend’s betrayal will teach you about forgiveness. A friend’s love will teach you about trust. Depression will teach you that it’s through the cracks the light gets in, failed business will teach you about patience. Failure will teach you to be persistent, success will teach you to be humble. Poverty will teach you to be grateful for the little things and poor health will teach you the value of self-care.
In this and many more one thing remains factual, Life is not always easy.
I have compiled a couple of lessons that is best learned early in life with the hope that it resonates with you and guides you as your chart the course of life.
Do what you love and love what you do – If you spend your productive time doing the things you love, it would not feel like work or a job. The things you love doing are intricately tied to your talent/passion/natural gifts. You will find that when you monetize this gift rightly, you will earn income almost effortlessly.
It’s ok to be different- We are running our own races and our journey is uniquely different. Many times our unique ability makes us different and can be our ultimate advantage. Do not let others make you feel inferior. Love yourself because until you believe in yourself you cannot make a difference.
You have to step out of your comfort zone to get success – I think this statement has had too much attention lately. Comfort zone is the killer of dreams. If you think you are comfortable being successful then you are already on your way down and out. Go out on a limb and take your chances, there is a reason why the audacious often become a success at whatever they do.
Everything is temporary – Your good times are temporary and so are your bad ones. No situation is permanent they say, but that is because life’s journey is full of twist and turns. As long as you know this, you will make the best use of the good times and persevere through the bad times.
Never compare your stars with somebody else sparkles – We all shine differently. Nothing can stop the moment when it’s your time. Be happy for others when their time of success comes, you will realize how difficult it will be for some people when they have to cheer you on when it’s your turn. With this in mind you will learn to be humble in your success.
The best way to deal with toxic people is to cut them out of your life as soon as possible – Don’t make excuses for toxic people. They don’t deserve a place in your story. You are as good as the friends you keep. If your set of friends, colleagues, business partners do not exude the values that matter to you, then let them go. You are probably better off without them.
Never stop learning and growing in life – For this happen you must be deliberate and intentional about it. You must learn every day. Seek to learn something every day. The moment you stop learning, you start dying. Think of it that way! We have two options: learn and grow, or repeat.
Never take big decisions of your life on jealousy – Decisions taken on a whim based on envy always turn out to be very regrettable. Channel your envy into improving yourself and creating a positive energy out of it. Don’t go about justifying why others success isn’t worth celebrating when you are yet to accomplish half of it.
Value the person who gives you time – it’s not just time, they share a part of life with you. One way to measure life is by the quality of time and impact made with others. If anyone considers you worthy enough of their time, you should appreciate them and value your relationship enough to share yours with them.
When nobody else celebrates you, learn to celebrate yourself – When nobody else compliments you, then compliment yourself. It’s not up to other people to keep you encouraged. It’s up to you. Encouragement should come from the inside.
You don’t need to apologize for things that are not your fault – Not everyone will agree with this but as you mature you realize that you take responsibility for your actions. And if you have made a bad choice, then you must account and atone for it. Otherwise what are you apologizing for exactly?
Choosing your partner is also choosing your future – It also means choosing your children, peace of mind and happiness or success. One wrong choice and one would rue lost opportunities. Marriage is not scary, marrying the wrong person is what makes it a lot worse.
Every relationship needs boundaries – If you are so eager to be in a relationship so much that you failed to establish the things that are important to you, you will leave the boundaries blurry and will pay dearly for it. Not only are failed relationships a waste of time, it scares you for the next one. Set boundaries early on and don’t compromise on your values. Loyalty without boundaries can be a form of self-harm.
Sometimes you need your feelings hurt – so you can wake up and focus on you. Speed bumps not only slow you down, they let you re-assess your position so you can be focused as you move on. Getting hurt is damn painful, but its better earlier in the journey than when there is so much at stake.
Money isn’t the answer but it makes a difference – It’s good to have money. As they say, money makes the world go round. But it still can’t buy happiness and it can never buy true love. Yes it would make the difference but you will soon realize that it’s not the most important thing in life.
Sometimes people are Investments and some people are bills – Know the difference. Need I say more? Be deliberate about how you spend when it comes to people you are with.
Life isn’t fair, it never was and never will – Get that in your head. Examples abound. Don’t go looking for self-pity because life has dealt you a punch while others get away easy. Pick yourself up and push the limiting boundaries for your breakthrough.
Communication is not just about what we say, but also about how we say it – Words have been known to break marriages, relationships and businesses. Many of them are based on unfounded accusations or assumptions. Some are a product of our insecurities. It is always good to ask the right questions to avoid behaviors inimical to our growth in life. Choose your words carefully and embrace dialogue during disputes.
It’s not your job to accommodate other people’s insecurities by making yourself small. –
Aside the fact that you are not helping the other person, you are not helping yourself either. Just like your path in life is not the same, stop changing to fit others insecurities. Let them deal with it.
Travelling makes your soul alive – If you can, travel and explore distant lands. Learn new culture, new skill, meet people, exchange ideas and infuse the experience into your life.
If it means something to you, fight for it till the end – We must live for something and the things that are important to us are worth fighting for. Don’t stay on the fence, give it your best shot and see it through till you get the desired result.
There are a lot more lessons to learn in life, but the ones above are a good place to start.
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