
Cheers to 2025
Every New Year holds promise, as though it is any different from the turn of
“Feel what you need to feel and then let go. Do not let it consume you” Dhiman
Honey your soul is golden!
Some mornings you wake up and it seem like the weight of the world is on your shoulder. You would rather pull the covers back over your head to escape the realities around you forgetting you were literally beaten to pulp in the dream you just woke up from.
Some days you wonder how you will make it through, the horizon looks bleak with all the attending gloom. The thunders scare you, the bellows shaking you to the core of your being unravelling your soul leaving you bare to the elements.
Sometimes you want to throw in the towel, you wonder if any of these is worth it. Why do you have to give so much and get so little? You ask questions that bear no answers, shaking your head in anger and disgust. Of course! You did not plan for any of these to happen. As far as you know, you are an innocent bystander who got dealt a cruel hand in a game no one taught you how to play.

You walk the street on a rainy day, all you have in mind is getting to your destination in one piece and not be late. Suddenly, the notorious Danfo you are supposed to board splashed muddy water mixed with an exotic concoction of Lagos waste on your pants! The same one you got the London tailor to tack on the worn zip for the 3rd time in six weeks. See dilemma!
Some mornings the sun doesn’t shine, the clouds are huge and overcast, darkness flows in the crevice of your soul, your heart is heavy and it seem like there is no respite in sight. The air in your room is laden with the smell of your helplessness and grief you simply cannot breathe. You touch your face but you don’t even know you are crying, salty rivulets soaking you pillow through your hands yet no sound comes out of your mouth.
They would pick your call on the first ring, but you got the machine for the twentieth time today. You can hear your own heart breaking from the strain of broken promises and dreams, the weight of unmet expectations and the hollowness of helplessness. You grab your pillow for comfort as the realization that the love you hoped to keep was never yours to hold. You ask where it all went wrong recounting the steps that led to this exact moment.
You have walked a distance when you realized there is nowhere to go. You feel like the penguin calling for its mate who had passed away the winter before, lost and alone without a place to call home.
You reach out to hold on to something but all you grab is empty air, it feels like water slipping through your fingers, weary like a lone traveler walking the path alone having drained the last drop of water from his jug, seven hours ago.
Suddenly, the center doesn’t hold anymore, that perfect life has come unraveled revealing all the parts and parcels you have tried so hard to hide and make wholesome for the looking crowd. The pack of cards carefully crafted is all coming down but there is nothing you can do than to watch as the cookie crumbles and the cup of milk so well placed comes crashing down splashing right at your feet. You barely save your dainty feet from being pierced by the shards of glass laying around daring you to take a wrong step.
Yes, it can all come crashing down.
True, some days we don’t want to wake up.
The flowers don’t bloom and the roses doesn’t smell sweet.
The colors aren’t vibrant and the cloud is grey.
The waters too cold for comfort and the heat unbearable.
The nights seem long, hard and unending.

The storm is fierce and relentless badgering you on every side you are almost certain you’d perish.
But here you are still waking up and showing up with a smile plastered on your face. You keep giving your best because you know your day will come and all the seemingly unending troubles will cease.
You look up the horizon and feel the sun on your face, you look up smiling, you can feel it’s about to be a wonderful day filled with possibilities waiting to be explored and new heights to attain.
You roll up your sleeves knowing there is work to be done, you pick yourself up because no one will do it for you and you are your own greatest cheer leader.
Pick up your pompoms sweetheart the drumline is coming.
You turn up your face as you step out in the rain, pick up your umbrella because the downpour cannot stop you from getting to your destination. Your wind breaker and jelly shoes are on fleek and you are about to flaunt them no end.
You look up to the sky to see a streak of the golden sun shining through the clouds warming up your face and aching body as the shadows fall behind. You know with confidence that the gloom you see is about to dissipate, light is about to break through and the day is about to be a hit back to back.
You unlock your doors to let the air in chasing the darkness away. Your spirit is bright, your smile is warm and your coffee is hot! The spring to your steps is clear for all to see, you are about to take on the world and they are not ready for the spice you bring but you will give them anyway. All the reasons they gave you why it cannot work are about to be disproved by you. This is you rising above the storm while they wonder how you made it through.
The day will arrive when you will wonder why you ever begged them to love you. You will be high on self-love knowing that you are worth it. Your heart will heal, your soul refreshed, you will not settle for a love that was made to break you and the love you deserve will come to you.
You will find out that you matter, all that has happened is to prepare you for something greater than you could ever imagine only if you let yourself see that this life is yours for the taking and only you can live it to the fullest. It is true that the road is hard and it looks like a long way to go but there is a beautiful destination right ahead of you. Just open your eyes to see the beauty that abounds and you will realize you are not alone.
You may not see it yet but your day will come, you will look to the skies and see the magic of the rainbow. The flowers will burst out in colors so bright with their fragrance making your head spin. The channels will break open and your life will be flooded with all that you have ever desired, prayed and wished for.

Tough time don’t last but tough people do is a saying we are all conversant with, the most inspiring people in history are the ones who chose to never give up regardless of their circumstances. They took situations that look like their end and turned it to a new beginning, a few examples I am certain people are familiar with- Jim Carrey, Turia Pitt, Jay-Z, Nick Vujicic, Ben Carson Colonel Sanders, Malala Yousafzai, Nelson Mandela. I dare say it is the way we choose to look at it!

Here are a few things to do when the wind is out of your sail –
Pray– Ask God or whatever higher powers you believe in for strength to carry on, it works!
Give– of yourself, time, your resources. What we give comes back to us.
Get inspiration– when all the chips are down it is best to connect to a source of hope. Things that give meaning to our live and reasons to go on.
Surround yourself with positive energy – Iron Sharpens iron. Choose to be around people who lift your spirit, who inspires you and never fail to tell you that your dreams are valid. People who tell us it is ok to realign and strategize, to pause and reflect.
Don’t stop Moving– don’t settle. Keep the momentum. Never give up. Try again. Give it another shot.
So I tell you today to believe in your own magic, step out of your comfort zone and see the transformation happen. I am not telling you it is going to be easy, I am telling you it’s going to be worth it.

Definition of terms
Danfo– a rickety bus used in the lagos metropolis.
London tailor – usually a man who carries out simple tailoring functions using a mobile sewing machine

Every New Year holds promise, as though it is any different from the turn of

Adaeze had been awake since 4 a.m.
Not because she was anxious — though she was — but because this trip felt different. After eighteen months of follow-ups, phone calls, and PowerPoint presentations polished to a mirror shine, the deal was finally ready to close. An investor meeting in Abuja. A partnership that would change the trajectory of her small but gutsy consulting firm. She had triple-checked her flight, her documents, her outfit. She had prayed. She was ready.

When he told his father, Dare’s first response was a sigh. Then: “I told you to practice more. I told you months ago. You don’t listen. You never listen.”
There was no “I’m sorry, son.” No pause to let the boy simply feel the loss of the thing he wanted. Just a swift, seamless pivot to what Temi had done wrong — and, by extension, how Temi’s failure was evidence of Temi’s failure to take his father’s wisdom seriously.

I want to tell you something that took me embarrassingly long to learn. Not because the idea is complicated — it is not. But because it cuts against something deeply wired in us, something we are rarely honest enough to admit.

You are somewhere between forty and fifty-five. You looked in the mirror recently and had a thought you immediately dismissed. Maybe you googled something at 2am that you would never say out loud. Maybe you bought something expensive and impractical and told everyone it was an investment. Or maybe you just feel — quietly, persistently — like the life you built was supposed to feel better than this by now.

Anton Chekhov was a Russian physician and playwright — a man trained in the discipline of diagnosis before he became one of the most precise storytellers in the history of world literature. That combination of sensibilities matters, because the principle he articulated in the late nineteenth century was not merely a rule of dramatic craft. It was an observation about the nature of significance itself. About what it means for something to be present. About the relationship between introduction and consequence.

There is a prison that has no concrete walls, no iron bars, no guards posted at the gate. Nobody built it for you. Nobody sentenced you to it. And yet, for many people, it is the place they spend the better part of their lives — circling its perimeter, brushing their fingers against its invisible boundaries, and quietly retreating each time they feel the edge of something that might require more of them than they believe they can give.

Picture a hand holding sand. The tighter the grip, the faster the grains escape between the fingers. Ease the grip — open the palm, allow the hand to become a vessel rather than a vice — and the sand stays. This is one of the oldest paradoxes of leadership, and one of the least learned: that control, pursued too aggressively, produces the very loss of control it was designed to prevent.

There is a version of ambition that builds. And there is a version of ambition that consumes. From a distance — and especially from inside it — they look almost identical. Both are energetic. Both are forward-moving. Both speak the language of vision and possibility. The difference only becomes visible later, usually at the point of fracture, when what was built begins to come apart under the weight of what was promised.

There is a particular kind of organisational absurdity that most people who have ever worked in a company will recognise immediately. It is the policy that was clearly designed by someone who has never had to implement it. The restructuring that looked elegant on a slide deck and chaotic on the ground. The customer-facing process that was overhauled by a committee that has not spoken to a customer in years. The directive that arrives from above, fully formed and non-negotiable, that causes the people closest to the work to exchange a look — the kind of look that says, without words: they have no idea what we actually do here.

We have built an entire mythology around exhaustion. In boardrooms and business culture — perhaps nowhere more so than in the high-pressure, always-on professional culture many of us inhabit — busyness has become a currency. To be tired is to be serious. To be overwhelmed is to be important. To be burning out, quietly, is somehow proof that you are fully committed.

There is a particular kind of failure that never makes the headlines. It does not arrive with a scandal, a public collapse, or a dramatic resignation. It builds slowly, almost imperceptibly, in the space between what a leader sees and what they choose to say. It lives in the meetings that end without the real conversation ever starting. It grows in the silence after a poor decision goes unchallenged, not because nobody noticed, but because everyone agreed — unspokenly — that it was simply easier not to say anything.

The boardroom at Crescent Capital Partners on Victoria Island smelled of leather and ambition — the kind that had been earned, aged, and perhaps left out a little too long. Emeka Osei-Bello, Managing Director and Group CEO, sat at the head of a long mahogany table, his charcoal suit immaculate, his posture the kind that says, I built this. He had, in many ways, done exactly that.

When you stay loyal to a version of yourself that no longer exists—the one who was hurt, the one who failed, the one who was overlooked—you are still choosing. You are choosing to let one moment in time define the whole arc of your life. And that choice costs more than it keeps.
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8 thoughts on “My Cri De Cœur”
Hi Jolade,thanks for this write up,very inspiring and refreshing, I can feel some heat escape my body.
Thanks once again
There has been no time, that a reboot process for the soul has been more pertinent to life, than now.
This is not how to get someone motivated at random. With the current uncertainty in human existence, this is a reset button for everyone. Rich, poor, oppressor, oppressed, believers and non-believers alike.
Pray. Give. Get inspired. Seek positivity. Don’t stop moving.
Emphasis on “Surround yourself with positive energy” . My motto. Lovely piece
This heavy feeling of not being enough can be quite depressing, buh we must keep pressing. Thank you for this inspiring and spirit-lifting piece
Beautiful write up
Beautiful piece
Wow, thank you so much. This was exactly what I needed this morning. It is a really good piece.
I sure needed these words of encouragement. I’m on the verge of a breakthrough but I am fighting doubts and unbelief. Another master piece from you is all I needed to push on. Thanks bro